How to Talk to Caitlyn

“Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were making an appeal through us; we beg you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God.” 2 Corinthians 5:20

When I heard the news and saw the magazine cover, I was stunned. Before my heart beat again, the Holy Spirit mutely cautioned, “Don’t say it.” He knew exactly what was percolating inside my wicked heart before I did. So I paused, asked Him for help, and promised not to write or post anything that day.

It was difficult. My flesh was chomping at the bit. “Let me at him,” it kept saying (I appreciate it when my sin nature is brash – it makes it easier to recognize). In contrast, the Holy Spirit was communicating tenderly, as usual. Actually it was as if He invisibly gestured no with His head and the maneuver created a holy breeze I somehow felt and interpreted to mean no. Needless to say, His counsel was unobtrusively powerful.

So I began this morning asking the Lord what, if anything, should I say? I felt the Lord immediately unburden me from the notion that I had to be a part of the national dialogue about homosexuality (in general) or transgenderism specifically. There are plenty of good folks out there already lovingly doing that. No, what I felt compelled by the Lord to do was to prepare myself to talk to Caitlyn directly (not literally, because that just isn’t going to happen). I should know what to say to the Caitlyn’s of the world if the opportunity arises.

The first thing I discerned was that I need to say the name Caitlyn. Yes, it pains me, but here’s the reality: as it pertains to a name, people have a right to go by whatever moniker they want and as long as it is not vulgar or obscene (in the traditional sense of those words), we should use them. Generally speaking, names are innocuous and we shouldn’t get too hung up on them and observing their requests give us a common ground where a dialog can begin.

However, re-identifying gender is another thing entirely and that of course is our first sticking point. Caitlyn is a he. Names we can change, but we cannot undo God’s workmanship. We can de-petal a rose and it’s still a rose. We can strip the stem bare of its buds, leaves, and thorns, and it is still a rose. We can toss the pieces into the furnace, collect the ashes, and but still undeniably it was a rose. There are no alterations so great or complex that can overrule the Creator’s design.

So what would I say to Caitlyn in that regard?

Nothing, at least not at this juncture. Caitlyn doesn’t need advanced theology instruction, she needs fundamental Bible lessons, for in Caitlyn’s mind everything I wrote above is foolishness. God would agree. Let me qualify that last sentence: God would agree that Caitlyn’s perception of the account is foolishness. 1 Corinthians 2:14 bears witness to that.

“[T]he natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned.

Caitlyn does not have the capacity to understand these maxims because the Holy Spirit has not taken up residence, therefore these premises are nonsensical; it’s exactly the condition God has told us about in His Word. It’s at this point the church should see the road sign advising us to turn around and take Caitlyn back to the basics; if there’s to be any hope for Caitlyn, we need to share the Gospel.

That’s easier said than done, right? The answer is maybe. It depends if you fully grasp these words of Jesus:

“For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:30

It’s God’s job to draw the sinner to the cross and He often does it through divine appointments. All that is to say that if we find ourselves suddenly having an audience with Caitlyn, it could very well be said that God ordained the encounter. God drew Caitlyn to this discussion, despite the fact that Caitlyn’s flesh is likely doing everything in its power to undermine the exchange. What makes it easier (for us) is that God doesn’t necessarily want us to give a Gospel presentation, but rather engage in a conversation where the soil can be prepared so the Gospel can be presented. In order to do that, we need to talk to Caitlyn, but more importantly, we need to listen to Caitlyn. There’s a door that needs to be opened and the only doorknob is on Caitlyn’s side. If it’s opened we must be careful to not barge right in and throw dirt on the carpet (the not-so-subtle technique used by vacuum cleaner salesmen). Sure, we’re aching to dive into Romans 3:23, but we must listen before we can be heard.

For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God

I suppose all that is to say [that] we need to be compassionate; the more outraged and incensed we might be, the more grace we need to exhibit. It makes no sense whatsoever to bowl the Caitlyn’s of the world over with Scripture that denounce their actions if they’re not saved. Essentially it’s like teaching calculus to a five-year old before they’ve learned 1 + 1 = 2.

So where do we begin?

If I ever get the opportunity it will go something like, “Hi Caitlyn. My name is Dave… so tell me about yourself.” If an ambassador for Christ can’t get past this first line, then it just might be that they need to return to the rudiments of our faith. If that’s where you are, rejoice! You have just been given an opportunity to grow spiritually.

Read Full Post »